Emotional Avoidance - Are You Guilty?

By Joe Martin

Be careful of the language you use for the reason that you will always get what you speak about but it may not necessarily be what you want. Your subconscious thoughts is really effective but it cannot judge - so it can't tell the difference between the word 'break' as in time out and the word 'break' as in break an arm or leg.

Isobel was a beautiful lady in her 60's who was looking soon after her pretty frail mother. She necessary aid with anything and had to be carried to the bathroom, to the sitting room - she would not use a wheelchair but as she was not heavy her daughter did not mind carrying her.

However Isobel also ran a pretty prosperous organization and at the finish of the day was exhausted not only from the number of clients but also from consistently getting on call for her mother. Then one particular day she walked into a closed plate glass door. She was lucky the glass did not break but she got a terrific shock and had a suspected fracture of her wrist.

Rather than go for an x-ray or medical treatment she came to me first. She stated: "I want to know why I could have broken my wrist - I want to know the hidden thought behind it. This is so inconvenient and I am so busy. It's the final factor I require." As we explored her exhaustion it became clear that she needed a break from her Mum: she was worn out with all the caring of her and felt trapped by her mother's requires. She loved her too significantly to put her in a nursing home but could not manage to appear after her any extra, either.

When her mother necessary the support Isobel needed a 'break' from it all - and this is specifically what her thoughts gave her. The break in her wrist was just enough to stop her being able to appear following her mum. Don't forget the subconscious thoughts can not judge between a break as in time out and the word 'break' as in break an arm or leg. So it looked immediately after Isobel and gave her the break she kept asking for. Not fairly the 1 she wanted but surely a 'break', which in reality gave her time out.

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